Feelings you can't speak of
by Zeovalguar
Summary: A short story about a secret love, featuring Alice Margatroid and Parsee Mizuhashi.


"Not at home, I'm out. Be back soon."

Alice.

Alice did not usually leave home, and when she did never left a note on the door. This surprised Marisa, who had come to visit her after the usual gathering of mushrooms.

-Well, well. Where did she go? Well! I know where she might be, I'll go for her, ze.

But Alice was not in any of the places that she used to go. On this occasion she had gone underground, where Satori and Koishi lived in the company of their pets Rin and Utsuho.

Utsuho ... When they confronted her, Alice remembered a strange youkai who was a bridge guardian. She sensed something familiar in that youkai, and she wanted to find and to talk her.

The road was dangerous, but Alice was not weak and could defend herself with remarkable thoroughness. However, on the way nothing happened. She advanced easily through the underground to reach the neglected bridge.

And there she was.

Immobile, looking down perhaps immersed in thought, her expression serious and melancholic, and that familiar aura that only Alice seemed to sense.

She approached her slowly, and as she realized her presence, looked up and prepared to attack, with threatening eyes.

-Stop! Nobody passes through here. This is a dangerous place and it is my duty to prevent the passage. Turn around or suffer the consequences.

-No, wait. I did not come to fight, I will not cross the bridge. I just want to talk to you.

-Huh? -She opened her eyes, very surprised- Talk with me?

-I was here time ago, during Utsuho's rebellion, remember? My name is Alice.

-Yes, I remember. You came with that black and white witch.

Alice nodded.

-And why would you want to talk to me?

-Well... This is hard to explain... but I've sensed, I've sensed something familiar on you. I feel something... Sorry, you must think I'm crazy.

The youkai remained silent, staring at her, her eyes trained on her. The silence and darkness of the cave, along with the creepy expression of youkai, made Alice feel really uneasy. She started to think that this was not a good idea.

-I… -said her at last- The truth is... I have also sensed something on you.

-Really?

-Alice... -She smiled slightly- Yes. I also felt something familiar about you. Do you guard something, right? A secret, something you value more than anything, and yet the mere thought of having it causes you pain.

Alice nodded in silence and bowed her head. The youkai was right. She felt strange, not only to feel the aura of the youkai, but as if it was something mutual.

-Come with me, Alice. Let's talk about it, if that is what you want. By the way, my name is Parsee.

Parsee guided her through a small gallery that was practically invisible until they reached a broader small section where there was a small house built in stone. It was rough and irregular, as if they had carved base hits. The door was simply a rectangular hole, covered with brown cloth worn.

-Have you built it yourself?

-No... someone helped me.

The interior was quite well furnished, though with different objects and in disrepair. A closet with the door drop medium, barely tied with rope, chairs of various sizes, some without legs, and a small kitchen full of rust and dents in some areas.

-Please, have a seat. -said politely with a gesture.

Alice appreciated the offer, nodding, and sat on the rickety table in the middle of the room. Like the rest of the house it was in very bad condition. One leg was a pile of dusty books, and a corner was broken and full of splinters. Really, the underground youkai were living in rather bad conditions.

Parsee poured two cups of steaming tea and sat down in front of her. For a youkai, she had pretty good manners. The first few minutes elapsed between moments of silence and short conversations between small stuff, until Parsee started the serious conversation.

-Tell me, Alice. That person, how are they?

Alice had been expecting that question from the moment she met her. It was why she had left home, after all, but still was surprised to hear it. She took a sip of tea, raised her eyes and began to speak with a dreamy tone.

_She ... is a person close to me. She's very strong, both physically and mentally. Although, actually, she has more faults than virtues. Yet ... yet the mere fact of having her around makes me feel good._

Parsee watched her guest in silence, listening to her words with full attention and occasionally letting out a quick smile, as if she knew beforehand what she would say. Occasionally, she would drink some tea and look again.

_She's intrusive, a little rude and direct above all. Never tell her a secret if you don't want half of Gensokyo to know it the next day. She also has a tendency to shoot first and ask questions later._

_However, it is remarkable how hard she works and eager she is to excel at what she does. She is always busy with something, training to become stronger, investigating to discover new things ... never gives up... Someone admirable._

-And I think that's all. -she concluded.

-More tea?

-Please.

Parsee went back to the kitchen and returned with other two cups of tea.

-What about you, Parsee?

She looked down, and grabbed the teacup with both hands shyly. She took a little breath and began to speak slowly.

_She is also a person close to me. She full of energy and vitality, you'll never see her without a smile, and always trying to cheer you up if you're sad. Sometimes, it is difficult to talk about something serious with her, she thinks it's all a joke. Her manners are a little ... no, quite rude and very rough. When you are with her at first you are happy, but after a while you get tired and want her to leave you alone. And when she leaves, you miss her and want her to come back._

Without doubt, she is also strong. Very strong.

This time Alice listened with full attention to Parsee, staring at her as she spoke with that faint melancholy.

-And, I have nothing more to add. -ended.

After a slight moment of silence, they smiled.

-It was a pleasure to meet you, Alice.

-Likewise, Parsee.

The sound of someone calling at the entrance surprised them.

-Parseeeeeeee! -said a strong female voice- Y' there?

-Yuugi! Come in, I have a guest!

Parsee blushed instantly, and Alice knew why. She remembered Yuugi, one of the four Devas of the mountain, along with Suika. Her nickname was "Yuugi the Strong". And she was a hopeless drunk.

-Hello, hello! -she said with glee, giving Alice a slap so hard she nearly threw her on the ground- Parsee! You never told me you had a new friend.

-S-She c-came today. Her name is Alice.

-Alice? Why, yes, I remember you! You and your friends gave a good lesson to Satori's little bird, huh?

-Ehm ... Well, yeah. We did what was necessary.

-No doubt, no doubt. She hasn't tried anything since. Sake?

-No thanks, I was leaving.

-Ohhh! And I thought we could have fun! Okay, okay, but you will be back, right?

-Of course. - replied Parsee- Whenever you want, right Alice?

-Sure. Yeah, thanks.

They left the house and walked slowly to the bridge to leave, it had been a very enjoyable evening.

-It was a pleasure, Alice. Like I said, come back whenever you want.

-Thanks Parsee. If you ever want to come to see me, go to the Forest of Magic. All west from here.

-I'll keep in mind, hope I... Oh, someone is coming.

Alice turned to see who was.

-M-Marisa? What are you doing here?

-You weren't at home and I came to look for you, ze. They told me you were going this way.

-A-ah, yeah? Anyway, how dare you to come here alone? Something could have happened to you!

-Nah! You know that I defend myself well, ze.-she put her arm around her shoulders as she smiled with her trademark naughty smile- Anyway, what are you doing with her?

-N-nothing! I came here to pick up some things, but I was leaving already. G-Goodbye Parsee.

-Goodbye, Alice.

As they left, Parsee watched them in silence. A tear rolled down her cheek.

-_Feelings you can't speak of..._ -thought Parsee.

-_…may not be there as well._ -thought Alice.


End file.
